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I have decided to start blogging more often, no need for just stories now we can do daily discussions and I might even put up a sports column. If writing is the key to creativity then give me the hinges.

More Feelings in less days

What separates one from the others, What makes her stand out while does her bold chiselled facial features explode into millions of pellets in my mind? Why on earth is she special and what makes her the perfect jigsaw in my puzzle... These are only a few of the several questions I ask myself on these recent chilly northern pre-winter nights in my Tyneside abode as i cuddle up on my bed with my consolation and my best friend between my fingers, why do the things you want so bad have to be so hard to come by, why does the love of fools come with so much oppression, desperation, confusion and outright pain.. These are a few of the host of thoughts streaming across my mind, like the ferry that plies the river Tyne.. A lecturer I have become accustomed to Liz would call this “shambles”. Back to the story.. i put out my consolation on the p.. oh multipurpose object on my bedside table (I’ve used it for so many things it cant simply be called a plate anymore) and the surge of fumes sets another thought into my rapidly growing gallery of thoughts.. WHAT IF I OFFSET THE FIRE ALARM ONCE MORE? Who cares, I wedge open the room door and return to my sanctuary, I add one more thought to the fray.. I am really ready to go the extra mile even of this thing works the way it should? And then once more i close my eyes and enter the realm where i can be anything I wanna be, where i usually relive my best moments and make believe scenarios..
My first glance at her said more than an ooh.!! It came along with a desire to pour her a glass of Champagne and of course i did not for reasons best known to me.. I don’t mean to throw you off the fray but a quick school of thought.. “Anything worth keeping is designed with the mechanism of a Frisbee, the harder you throw it away the more likely it is to come back to you, but be warned its not about brute force, it has more to do with finesse” Well going back to the thoughts, It was Three days later and i saw her again an this time it was a picture, so i thought I could behave however i deemed acceptable, Instead of a look at the features and the facial strong points I found myself more engrossed in her eyes and I the weirdest thing happened, I heard her speak she said.. “Make the difference in my life and in yours if u dare” I closed the window of the browser and rubbed on my eyes.. and thought for a minute, the in re-opened it and placed a comment the first on the picture, and I wrote with utmost confidence, off the top of my head, it felt like a divine message from the heights of the heavens and i blurted it out in a single native African statement. The journey to more feelings in less days began

Cold Sweat

I awaken to the vibrations of my phone, hopefully it might be her, it is her but its not her I wonder if she has completely pulled the plug this time. I close one eye shut and squinting through the other one I unlock my phone. 3 missed calls 2 texts and 3 BBM conversations, “definitely she dropped one of these” is what i said to myself. Glancing through them all I noticed none were from her. In one move I hopped out of bed and took four steps exactly to the door, I turned on the lights and moved further into the bathroom to freshen up. As I scrubbed thoroughly on my teeth I heard my phone ring again... I dashed back into the room and reached for my phone and guess what.? It was the girl I met at the house party. With an emphatic hiss and sigh i slammed the phone on the bed and walked back to the bathroom. Eventually i rinsed my mouth and dropped onto the toilet seat and then wandered into the place where everything revolves around me and where I have the power to influence the script... I wondered into my subconscious. Faint pictures in particular order riddled my mind I was in love once again and I knew it. The images i saw too faint to ascertain but so intense to be a fallacy she said I hadn’t done much to please her, she said I rested on my laurels is what I bellowed to a surprisingly concerned handful of people; rage, insecurity, fear, all mustered into one emotion caused me to surprise myself. I became less audible and my words slurred I notice a tear had crept out of my left eye and I dashed away from the people and ran to sit isolated back to back under the tree. With my head in my hands I wept.. And then something happened I heard a sound I was so accustomed to it overrode everything and then the sound became louder, louder and then i snapped it was my phone and this time I walked slowly to the room thinking the girl from the house party had tried to call me back.. I picked up my phone and it read 2 missed calls I clicked on it and lo it was her not her, but her... My journey to more feelings in less days continued

Next Stop

“Next stop is ......, this train terminates at .......”, I looked at my watch and it was 7:55pm characteristically I never was the type to get anywhere until the evening breeze has spread duly. I barely caught a minute’s nap during the journey as I had taken the northern rail train direct from Newcastle. Inevitably; the train stopped and the doors opened. I jumped out and the first thing I did was to reach into my pockets and pull out my Royals 10 pack, id become so accustomed to this brand that as I walked in the supermarket a minute from my house the lady in the shop always winked and put it in my groceries without having to ask. Notwithstanding the cold breeze, I wore a light navy blue t-shirt with matching skinny jeans and red shoes (yes red!) I pulled out the lucky stick; in case you don’t know the lucky stick is the one we guys flip upside down in the pack and save for the last. This time I couldn’t be arsed I pulled out lucky. I sat on the station bench and put the cigarette in my mouth and lit away. Why wasn’t impatient me in a hurry to get to her house? I ignored that thought, from my bag I pulled out a bottle of red wine and gulped away. I had come this far and had developed cold feet at the last moment. By this time it was 8:21 (pm of course) and I was still there on the bench. I closed my eyes slowly like I do when I like to drift away, but this time there was no world to enter, the freezing night ensured my mind could not wander away. So I reached into my pocket for my phone to ring her and ask for directions. The building was amazing, I liked it. The doors swung open as she placed her hob on the reader as much as she tried to keep it simple and lock away her emotions I still noticed the smile and the blush, she turned away so I wouldn’t notice, so I pretended not to. Standing at about 5’8 with skin the colour of caramel what am I saying caramel mixed with a pint of milk, she led me to another door which she opened with the same hob, but this time she pushed it open. And then we got into the lift and it took her floor.. “So high up I said, why?” she replied “I like it here and I had placed an order for the apartment too late” and then we walked out of the lift and we were finally in her apartment. I dropped my bag on the floor carefully hoping that way she might not have noticed that I brought a bag. And then I used a couple of minutes to adjust to the room and enjoy the scenery. I quickly made myself at home and opened up her computer and browsed, oops I meant “used the internet” right away. Before I knew it she had cooked me dinner and I could not refuse and certainly did not regret it. We watched the telly for a bit and it was now 11 or so pm and we retired to her room. We lay together side by side watching a movie and I closed my eyes shut, this time to sleep and I heard her say the most amazing thing in the world.
Stay tuned for more short stories from the series more feelings in less days

New work: Watching them Watch us

Sitting at the table enstrangled by her beauty, surrounded by snooty couples and jeered by the smooth melody being played by the house band I knew for sure that this one time I would be unable to fight my subconscious and I would eventually slip away into my world, I had tried my best not to do so but being the shy person that I am it was always comforting for me to do so growing up. It helped me face my issues in a unique way, it helped to my first dance as a teenager and made me more self in-touch it also ultimately transformed me into the ladies man I was then. So I was always going to fade away it was just a matter of time, so I tried to strike a balance an uneven balance I let my gaurds down and my world with utmost disregard for my wishes took over me.

I looked into her eyes one more time and her grin was too much to bear she sat opposite me and the lighting in the room reflected gloriously on her fair skin her eyes white and clear fierce as usual her bust unconcealable with the polyester top and fitted jacket she wore, there was something about her today she looked amazing she always did, but today she drove me insane I was excited and I appreciated her beauty for once... It was a good sign. "Can u give me a minute I asked" why do u want to go she replied, and I insisted I be excused. Walking down the halls being stared at by the nosy people seated strategically around the hall I managed to walk out of the building, coming outside a chilly breeze slapped across my chest it followed with a cold chill that ran up my spine to the backk of fmy head,I sighed and took a deep breath in, by this time I had reached for my pocket to pull out my B&H 10 pack I pulled out the lucky stick closed my eyes and lit away. With the first drag and my eyes closed I felt the tension leave my body as fast as the DLR train from W'wich Arsenal and at that time I knew I had 5 mins to indulge in my fantasy world without any distractions, it would be jus me my thoughts, the breeze and the cigarrette in my hand. I drift into this world a bit too much these days so to keep it under control, for once i declined it.

Then I thought to myself was I ready to make this step, to send out this promise what if things go badly wrong and then I decided to forget about this (When I say this I mean the relationship) but I couldnt at this time maybe I was spineless or maybe I just knew my future lied with her. By this time I had wasted half of the ciggarrette with another drag I felt like I had taken a sip of courage potion and I mustered up the courage, I immidiately dropped the cigarrette on the floor and stepped on it with my flat black shoes and looked up at the English flag and made a silent vow. I barged through the doors and then walked with purpose like when the delivery guy rings the bell and has your pizza. I ignored the stares from the rich people who wandered what I was doing there, I crept behind her and dropped something on the floor next to her chair. I sat down and grinned at her, she smiled and said "whats ur problem abi?"In my mind I had done the most romantic thing in the world, But I was wrecked by nerves I was shaking inside of me I was hoping that she liked it, I wanted her to feel the hidden meaning of the gift. I replied "I think you dropped something on the floor she turned to look on the floor and then looked back at me with excitment and those eyes that melt my heart to peices and confirm to me that I would not have the courage to ever leave her, the grin she wore that no one else dared to. This lady has me on lock i sighed and thought to myself. She looked at me and pierced my soul with her smile I was shattered I was broken without her saying a single word, I had officially had my second best moment with her.. My Journey to more feelings in less days had just gained momentum.